(June 25, 00:14am)

A very tiring day it was.. Woke up at 6:30 after only four hours of sleep and yet not retired to bed..

Since I would not be returning Patna till the end of the year, unless there is a flattering turn of luck, I got muma's yearly shraddh performed today..

Though the pooja was over by later afternoon, I went out for miscellaneous purchases, that are warranted before a long travel to another city...

Then in the evening I needed to go to the Ganges banks, to immerse the pooja remaining, an obligatory custom in the Hindu faith,..

XXX

In the late evening, after only a tea's break, I went to see a neighbour in the apartment next to ours.. she's an old acquaintance of mom, and has maintained cordial relations with us even in her absence..

She offered me copy and a plate full of different snacks.. After the gruelling day's work and a fasting for greater part of the day, I loath to have it..

I looked at the coffee with an annoying feeling and avoided it, till a request from her side left me with no option but drink it..

God, then it was a pleasant surprise.. It wasn't a hot one.. It was cold coffee and tastefully made.. Honestly, I quite loved it.. sometimes we form opinion without testing things,.. this holds true in so many other situations in life..

XXX

(June 23, 00:49am)

I went to meet Mrs Ghosh, muma's old time principal in college and family friend, this afternoon..

It was a quiet afternoon when clouds suddenly showed up all around like unsought guests... We were seated in one of her parlours in the first floor of the quaint duplex bungalow..

Across the grills at the other end of the wall, there were canopy of trees becokoning in into the chamber, while the rains poured vigorously..

I obliged her request for a vivid account of my professional affairs in the last one year, and she listened to it rather attentively, probably visualizing the high profile MEA events I attended, in the back of her mind..

XXX

I admire her a lot and she is pretty affectionate to me.. She inquired about my father too, though she has been more fond of my mother and does not really have a very high opinion about him..

Her only daughter, married with two teenager kids, had come to spend the long summers with her.. and it was only yesterday she took leave of her as her sons school reopened today..

The 80 something lady said she was feeling rather nostalgic and it was great that I had come to see her.. Among other things, we discussed literature..

And she is very fond of the subject although she had been a professor in History..

XXX

(June 23, 00:43am)

Last few days in Patna... Because I am taking up a new job in Delhi, there would not be holidays anytime soon.. I'm doing mumma's yearly shraddh rituals in advance, hence.. On Wednesday..

I don't think I'd be able to come back in September, when the occasion naturally falls..

XXX

I have decided I will save money now.. I have got an increment and in any case, even in my old salary at IANS, I would have saved a lot had I not rented out an apartment in a posh locality..

This time I am not gonna spend more than 12K a month on the lodging.. If I compare this to the 18K that I was doling out last time I save 6K.. plus the increment is there..

My Mami who lives in Kolkata wants me to save 14k a month religiously.. and throw this away into a RD account..

I guess she is right.. I must abide by what she advises me..

XXX

(June 20, 11:42pm)

It is that time again when I am packing up after a long stay at my mom's apartment in Patna.. The river-view apartment by the banks of holy Ganges..

Nestled in lush grounds in the heart of the city, from where the balconies offer a view of the city's vast expanse, this is the perfect place to unwind after a day's work or think of or do things that inspire great literature...

In the night, from the windows at the rear end of the house, you can see constellation of stars bending down to kiss the serene waters of the river..

Would you not understand, then, what a melancholy it might bring to even think of locking up this place and go back to the noisy hustle of New Delhi's crowded streets?

XXX

I have signed on as the chief reporter of The Sunday Guardian, which is the print vertical of NewsX.. I would also be looking after the desk team as chief copy editor..

The position is in the bureau and hopefully there would be again a glamorous ministry to look after..

In IANS, I had been looking after the MEA and Congress.. I left it for some time, and in any case, I had already sought a work-from-home arrangement in the past months..

XXX

A lot of people spread the word, that I was out of offer... Poor creatures, they did not know offers had been pouring in every two weeks.. But I was reluctant to take up anything outside the bureau..

It had taken me a good toil to get into the bureau, and no hike in compensation would tempt me to accept a city beat..

Thankfully, I have found a good platform again... And this being a weekly there would be some time to myself, I hope.. May be I would read more.. write more.. may be start the book..

XXX

(June 20,11:25pm)

For a long time I have not been writing.. and I believe it is better to write rather than try and find excuses why I did not...

Yes, I explained to you earlier I had been disturbed... not that I was out of plans.. But there was a hurry in my part...

I sometimes want everything to fall in place as imagined in the plan.. and I want that to fall in place all at once..

There is an unmanageable rigidness that stops me to give more time to the issues at hand, or if a plan is not working out, try out an alternate one.. No, I am not devoid of ideas.. but it is the hurry.. a second leg of action would mean a longer wait... and I am not prepared to accept it...

But in all these months since the dawn of the new year, I tutored myself to be more patient.. To allow time for the plans to realise.. and in the meantime, lose neither hope nor the energy to do so many other things that beg for attention in everyday life..

I hope I will be more patient.. and wiser.. and that pacified state of mind would also mean I would write more often..

XXX 

(June 3, 21:49pm)

I am reviewing some job offers.. Will let you know..

I plan to start working from July 1.. what do I do in the mean time? Currently, I am working for this news portal on a freelance basis.. A Kashmir based news portal that is opening a branch office in Delhi..

I'm recruiting their staffers.. but that does not absorb all my time.. I do have leisure.. and I am free to travel.. If I had the money, I would have gone to this village in Himachal..

Khajjar!

That's a serene meadow in the foothills of Himalayas.. Water bodies abound and hills dot the place from all sides..

Will I one day be able to have a farm house in such tranquil, far-from-the town haven?

I hope, I do..

But for now, I do not have the money to travel.. so, I guess I will read... and write my thoughts here, over this blog..

XXX

(Apr 28, 2:44am)

It is common among us to think of a past era and conclude it to be more happy and more blissful..

It is our way to run away from the complexities of today, and imagine that what was past was also necessarily simpler..

Was it?

The other day, as the families assembled in the ground following earthquake aftershocks here, I heard those children discussing the homework..

One was very scared that he had not been able to learn the tables.. and as he narrated the horrifying demeanour of the Maths teacher, it seemed to me that this unseen person was the most brutal of all..

And it was clear, that it seemed to the child that his Maths teacher would most certainly devour him up the next day... for his failure at this "learn by heart" assignment..

Hadn't we all been at his stage and situation in the past?

Didn't it seem to us then, that the lives of adults was so much more superior.. as it seems to us today that the lives of these little children is free of burden?

And still, we run away... into some different situation.. sometimes we imagine ourselves, during our happy dreams, in the shoes of somebody else.. somebody who we think is happier.. somebody who is our neighborhood example of a successful man.. somebody who we perhaps envy..

But do we, in the midst of it all, realise we too are subjects of envy... that there may be so many out there who think we have the more pleasant circumstances?

I think, we ought to... That will make us content... that will make us aware of and embrace the gifts God gave us.. that will end the desire in us to seek happiness in idle reveries that do not come true..

XXX