(Sep 26, 8:28pm)

Last year, maa's shraaddh (funeral) was held this day.. friends had worked like hell.. more than brothers would do.. and so many ppl had come!

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Back in Del..

joined work today!

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(Sep 24, 9:51pm)

The anniversary rites were observed peacefully.. and warmly.. i felt blessed, and thats important.. that tells you, your wishes are fulfilled, your prayers answered..

And yes, i did something revolutionary.. thanks to the priest, who was not your typical advocate of the old order.. men who discredit conscience, and stifle it too... in abhorable preference for conservatism...

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I shall write about it shortly sometime..

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I had invited only few ppl.. as mom was averse to show, mostly.. but the guests liked and lauded me for the arrangements... particularly the menu.. which they thought was rich in courses, and a bait enough to indulge..

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In the evening, I was off to Ganges.. in that old temple bank.. of Goddess Kali, in the erstwhile courtyard of the Maharaja.. it was a flood of rains, but i had had in mind that i'd distribute supper and money to urchins...

So, i went there regardless... Remember I told you the holy river is pregnant with water this time.. so, none of the 70 or more stairs were visible... only water.. all pervading water.. all-purifying water..

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Of holy Ganges, which liberates souls,

and relieves the dead of all sin!

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I prayed.. in silence.. and against the wind.. and against the sound of gurgling river.. trying to commune, trying to feel a feel that was sacred...

The moon was banished by thick clouds..

but its warmth, penetrated still..

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(Sep 22, 1:13pm)

The first death annv rituals on saturday... and im running against time.. have to do all on my own this time.. my gang of friends being away..

But at least my maids r good.. i can really trust the household chores to them..

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Go Congress Go..

The dinner plates- 150 rs last time- r cuming for 250 rs, and that aftr dropping the dessert.. gr8.. if you give them anthr turn, even Ambanis will be left adjusting budgets...

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(Sep 18, 12:49pm)

When i lit diya in the evening, and over a cup of tea watch the Ganges flow, it's the most beautiful feel! The Holy river would be pregnant with water this time...

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It's good to be home... i don't have to worry about my breakfast.. or the other chores.. the maids, particularly Bharati ji, are there to trust...

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(Sep 14, 11:15am)

In The Times of India's Patna edition today..

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(Sep 13, 2:11pm)

I adjusted my budget from two thousand to four, eyes blinking with sleep inside the aircraft.. But then, once into their office, two hours later, Im comforting myself: "Don't worry... It won't exceed 20 thousands.." "Cheer up, that's five less than 25.. there's this doctrine of negative optimism you invented, remember..."

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I tried doing just that, thinking of between, the burlesque "not at all" to the ToI receptionist.. when shown the routine obituaries.. "It must be a picture with specific content.."

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She asked me to wait, and while she explained to the designer over phone, I prepared myself for the worst arithmetic..

The buckle stopped at 9600, though.. "Yeah, you'd have it as you like.." she assured.. And have it I must.. anything for giving mom the dignity, her place and rank call for..

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I pissed them with design instructions... pointing out the fonts, the italics, the impacts.. twice and thrice the same things..

"Yahan experts baithte hain (Experts are here)... all that is not required," somebody said.. Meanwhile, one glance at the content, and the designer recognised mom.. and from what I understood, he seemed to have fairly good opinion of her.. as a scholar.. I mean he actually discussed this with others around..

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Tomorrow it comes..

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Bharati ji is doing the home.. she'd be done by evening hopefully..

Lets see..

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According to Hindu calendar, we have the death anniversary rituals on 23rd.. But, I'd be praying tomorrow nonetheless..

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(Sep 10, 12:58am)

45 days into the job, and here i get 14-day leave!

Wotsay Duke???

Anyways... chuck the rogue..

Flight to Patna on 13th morning!

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(Sep 6, 10:26pm)

Im so happy.. On mom's b'de there's so many pageviews!

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A packed day @ ofc.. returned only at 9.. But din't I tell you.. sometimes, I can be just as happy in little things..in little arrangements..

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Got a chocolate truffle packed.. and some pizza and pasta too.. Haha.. i was so upset, it wud be too late.. but it wasn't..

Had a lovely dinner at 9:30.. having washed, and doing up the room a lil.. Clicked pics of the cake too, will upload sometime..

"Happy B'de Mom," it read!

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(Sep 6, 00hours)

Happy Birthday, Mom!

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(September 05, 8:20pm)

The Goddess still listens to me... and just as readily, lovingly.. fulfilling each one from the list of my dreams.. and with the love of doting parents!

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It's mom's b'de tomorrow.. and look, there's no house to do.. no presents to buy.. no excuse to shout at the helps and admonish them.. snatch the broom, the plates, and be their willing replacement.. zest for perfection having overridden judgment..

And all this quickening my thoughts...and then filling with dismay.. the weather too was gloomy.. and cold.. and the tv not working.. creating a kind of feel when sweet thoughts bring sad thoughts to the mind... when you want to live old moments again, and then realise they are dead...

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It was desperate feel... But the Goddess dropped her bounty at once.. and as I called.. She does always..

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