(Feb 27, 10:53pm)

Leaving for Nasik tomorrow for personal work.. Will come back on 5th and perhaps update you more then..

Actually, going to this famous Trayambakeshwar Temple to get some pooja done.. Mr Bajpayee, the well-known and trusted astrologer here had been telling me I'm afflicted with Kaal Sarp Yog..

A kind of planatory configuration that minimises benefit, even when you put in adequate hard work.. that's quite true in my case actually.. Have experienced that since childhood...

So, on 3rd, they will do this pooja which neutralises malefic planets... May be they will ask me to take a dip in the holi Bhadravati.. Im guessing so.. since they have asked me to carry a fresh kurta pyajama and a towel..

XXX

Anyways.. The other day I had lots of fun at Funtasia Island.. City's first water park.. Clicked some good pictures too ... shall be uploading..

By the way, remember I told you all my adversities are now over.. And that it seems like mom is here again.. peace and comfort, and the sheer security of having a guardian is here again?

Will elaborate on that more later.. for now, I have my hands full with re-doing the house in Patna.. Im changing the bed... actually remodeling.. plus innumerous wall deco-s and portraits.. most of them of the family's..

And since Im very detailed in such things, say the background, the colour contrasts, which frames to go at what places, how narrow or long should they be, it's consuming good amount of time..

XXX

Then the sofa has gone for repairs.. Changing the orange velvet into sea green!

Plus of-course my selection process for studying abroad.. and other fellowships, for all of which I have been writing endless proposals, relentlessly since January mid..

And the whole new stratagem for a major shift/impetus in career, including of-course, a well-thought of schedule for writing my novel, for which I will be spending two months somewhere in far north; not telling you where exactly..

And once again, the whole exercise of finding myself a feature-writing internship in this far north town.. hopefully at a good newspaper there..

I think that would engage my time more meaningfully.. besides adding to my expertise as journalist.. Every city has a soul and a story emanating from it, don't they?

Looking forward to breathe a new culture, a new ethnicity, a new ethos.. and between them, the common human desire to grow, to be well thought of by others, and become more prosperous than we already are at a given time..

XXX

Then there's also the onus of not letting one aspiration belittle the other, which in turn depends on how good you are at allotting time to your list of activities.. In my case, it is not too easy..

Studying abroad, availing a fellowship programme, gearing up the novel, finding internship in an unfamiliar city, focusing on my present job, redoing the house!

The list is endless, and time is limited.. Hope I do not mess up!

XXX

(Feb 21, 6:13am)

Will write.. give me few more days please...

XXX

(Feb 10, 1:45am)

So he was hanged because, not withstanding the absence of any direct involvement, not withstanding the Apex Court's observation that there was no evidence that Mohammed Afzal belonged to any terrorist group or organisation, not withstanding that the circumstantial evidences against him - not too often used to award life sentences, leave alone execution - were if anything, insufficient and incoherent, the "collective conscience" of the Indian nation deemed this necessary... Wondering who and what contribute to and constitute our collective conscience?? Herds of under-educated, under informed right wing activists, with no proper knowledge and hence no proper judgement and/or understanding of the vast and intricate and centuries-old issues plaguing a conflict region, but still, as though by some divine ordinance, have appropriated the power to act as judges?? Or, a well organised media mafia, with bosses as disagreeable and as authoritarian as Arnab Goswami, which more often than not operate as a machinery for state propaganda rather than serve as platform for the oppressed?? And also, if collective conscience were so paramount in this nation, then why single out just one person??? Wouldn't the collective conscience of the minorities in Gujarat, or the Sikhs in Delhi, would have - in fact must have - desired a similar fate for their respective perpetrators??? But as history has it, and as the near future would most likely have it -we allowed one such perpetrator to be our Prime Minister, and will most surely allow the other one too in 2014!!!!! @State Hypocrisy

XXX

(Feb 8, 1:59pm)

Will write, will write.. Give me a few days more.. and yes, my difficulties are over.. I can do what I like now.. as I used to earlier..

It's good.. it's grand.. It's like Mom is here again.. and looking after me again...

XXX

(January 15, 9:23pm)

Why is this taking long? and why are 'ends', especially ones which germinate into new beginnings, necessarily take long?

The Gods, where are they... I don't want one more day of January wasted now.. 2013 is mine... It has to be adequate and organised.. like it used to be earlier.. when Mum was around..

XXX

Once this matter is resolved, I'd be freed of the 28 months of incessant torment.. in the form of absence of peace... content too... I thought today would be that day..

But now it seems this man would eat away some more of my time... Anyway, let me be patient.. I have to.. that's my new year resolution after all..

XXX

(Jan 14, 4:37pm)

Happy Makar Sankranti folks.. How are you all? In full festive fervour? We Bongs have 'peethe' on this day..

That's a special sweet prepared with rice powder with different stuffing such as kheer, peas, potato inside.. and cooked in vapour and then fried with minimum spices to give delicate aroma..

XXX

Lots of memories of this day.. we'd go to grandmum's place and all of us would make them together, and then have them over dinner.. That's the ritual..

Having the kheer peethe-s tonight.. Excited..

XXX

I know I am blogging too little, and I do feel guilt ridden when I see you guys coming to this site, vide the feedjit and blog stats, and probably feel disappointed..

Would be writing more often soon.. waiting for some matter to be resolved.. something which would give me INDEPENDENCE from my present worries once and for all..

Once that happens, I would write to you lot of stuff.. In fact, I am having some fab plans for myself this year, and want to discuss all of that with you..

XXX

(Jan 1, 12:10am)

With the hope that we do not need heinous crimes to wake up to heinous crimes, Happy New Year 2013!

XXX