(December 24, 5:35 pm)

Who is ANON 99?
why does he/she still read my blog?

I mean, you see its not saucy anymore.
and i genuinely thought, like others, anon must have had had stopped long before.

XXX

What does that suggest?
why he/she wants me change the color of my blog.

Does he/she want me happy...and perhaps more hopeful..
why remain just anonymous then?

and why i bothering?
do i want her/him be friends..i mean, i was even trying the new templates the other day...and i also left a message id be taking my time..

XXX

(December 24, 5:11 pm)

"2011 will be a very happy year for you, and you will have many laughs and good times!"

Will the FB predictions come true indeed?

XXX

Bro's b'de today. Im missing it the first time.
There were some arrangements at home, in place of the usual bashes.

I made it a point to rise at 7 today..My co-tenant was left gasping. "You're going to some temple, right?" he asked in disbelief.

XXX

Id be working on both X-mas and my b'de on 1st.

XXX

(December 23, 4:54 pm)

It was December 23, 1992..I was young...very young..
but, the memories are clear like marbles..

Since the Gods knew our days were numbered, they bestowed me with sharp memory. They needed to prove they were kind.

XXX

The Babri had just been pulled down, and anticipating the riots, we had left our sprawling cottage-house in Sultanganj, and moved to this place where Muslim population was thin..

Grandmum had tough time convincing mumma, since even her personal tailor and the tax consultant were muslims..

XXX

I despised the house...but since it offered me a view of the main road, from where i could keep a watch for mumma to return, i had agreed it as periodic arrangement..

XXX

So, there i was in the terrace that afternoon, standing under the radiant sun.."Look its approaching four now, she said she'd come by 2," I told my brother, with whom i had played the ludo and hide and seek many times already...and left with no innovations now, had decided to just kill time, looking at the street below..

XXX

Every year, after our schools had closed for winters on December 3rd or 4th, we counted the days for 23rd to arrive..Mumma's last working day!

And with bro's b'de the next day, she'd hurriedly come back from college, dress us up, get us a brunch, and we'd be off shopping...we bought the jackets, we bought the shoes..pairs of denims, santa caps, wind-cheaters..gloves and mufflers to match..story books, toys..the cake, the meat-balls...the list would be endless, because mumma, before she'd come to pick us, would have encashed whatever was left in her bank that day..

XXX

23rd December 1992.
Bro still was waiting for mumma.

XXX

But, I was waiting for the culprit.

XXX

Brightness slowly began to dull, and despair set in like some unsought guest..i was more and more sure she had failed us. Yeah, she'd turn up, but without the money.

Grannie had just told us how we were in for a crisis..how Mumma had first squandered everything, her arrears, her deposits, her NSCs...then indulged in relentless charity..and this magnanimity as if so intoxicating, she hadnt even bothered to draw salary between..

XXX

So unless there was some bounty of magic, we would not have any money for the year end.. Her salary would come only on Jan 2nd, when the university reopened..

Fingers crossed, we waited.
We prayed.
We implored upon the Gods to be kinder..
Else bro's birthday would be wasted.
Even Xmas.
My b'de too, which coincided on New Year.

XXX

But she would not turn up. "Why is she taking so late. Is her salary credited. Why did she have to go looking for it the last day. why dint she draw it three months? And why did she spent all her money away?" I asked irritatingly.

"May be it's credited," bro suggested, not willing to give up.

"In that case she'd have come already."

"May be she is shopping," he tried to reason.

"Without us? No way." I dismissed.

XXX

And then with careless abandon to how it might upset him, asked him again, "Will she come?"

"Not again," he stooped me midway.

"Will she..."

"Will she what," this time he didnt beat around the bush, "She is not dead. Nobody dies just suddenly. But if you believe she has, do it all to the Goddess, please."

XXX

He left.

XXX

I felt better. His outburst had somehow convinced me she was not dead. So i was back the tyrant again. Awaiting the culprit.

XXX

It was a long wait.
The sun God said he'd send the moon to befriend.

XXX

XXX

XXX

From the crossing, she appeared like spring.
And the grace in her walk, undid all the wrongs that were done.

XXX

Who'd say she had been so long into the 40s...
Except the laugh lines, perhaps.
But, they appeared only when she laughed tumultuously.

XXX

She did rarely.

XXX

She was wearing pure-silk saree.
It was finest silk. Grannie's testimony to mumma's indulgence.

XXX

The story goes that in the late 1960s, decent pure silks were available for Rs 120. The classy ones came for 200. But if you were the type who wanted the bride-hunters do talking, you wore a 300..to upset would-be brides, a 350...and to let the men gasping, a 500.

And upon such times, i am told, mumma had bought this sari for 900.
Even professors were paid 800 then, aunts had added.

XXX

To be continued....

Am i under some jinx?

First, this bank doesnt activate my account...which is why my salary was sent back to Chennai..and now when the headquarters issues me a fresh cheque, i see my name is mis-spelt..

Lets see if ICICI still credit it..

XXX

(December 21, 5:39 pm)

Im thinking of subjects for my short story.
It has to be a simple one.

I believe short stories are more like potraits. You do not really need to ornament things, to make the proatagonist speak..Even a slight contraction of the temples could be powerful communication..

XXX

The other day i was reading about this woman, who had to ampute her breast. It was a simple rendering of her agony. Minus inverted mournings or any elaboration on the travails of surgery.

It was just about the woman pushing herself against the bed..tightly....emphatically...as if that would hide her 'pride' which was undone..the husband was preparing for office silently..

I liked it. I too think and write on similar veins. And similar situations. I hope i can craft it well too....for the Commonwealth event..

XXX

(December 20, 5:05 pm)

Yes, i'll do change the color of my blog.
sooner than later.

But, ill take my time.
It shouldn't be cosmetic exercise.

XXX

(December 20, 4:55 pm)

I fixed it finally..
For Nishat Sir..
who's everybody's my-dear!

XXX

Now i need to get some important contact nums for him.
I hope im able to do that too.

XXX

All our comp-offs and leaves will lapse this year.
"They" are so happy about it..schemeing machines.

Poor me. Poor M*****i.

XXX